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Haak

Håkon Wale, formerly known as "Nord Viking Child," and has occasionally been addressed as "The Tromsø Terror" is the prophesized bringer of doom who would bring about death and destruction to the plebe-infested world of MAL. He would later become famously known as "Håkonborne" and "Ultimate Dragon Hunter" who has a 9001.999% success rate in hunting the rarest and most dangerous dragons in both the known and unknown universe. These dragons are later transported to Nidhoeggr's Cave of Wonders, a deed pivotal in bringing about enlightenment to plebes everywhere.

Nord Viking Child Origins

Legends state that when his village was attacked by a pack of wild jabberwockes, Håkon burst out of his mother's womb and fought off the ferocious beasts all by himself. The village feared the child's innate ability to breathe fire and do kickflips only a minute old in his existence that they banished him to the Southern Islands, where no man has ever escaped.

Håk forever cursed the village who shunned him and vowed to bring them chaos. He trained his body so much that his entire body became as hard as diamond. Not even AIDS or the plebeian plague could penetrate Håk's invulnerable body.

Håkonborne: Ultimate Dragon Hunter

After fighting in numerous wars as a mercenary-for-hire, he almost met his end at the hands of Nidhoeggr. The Almighty Führer saw potential in the young warrior and offered him a shot at ultimate uber glory. Håkon would highly contribute in the ongoing Great MAL Purge, his legendary status earning him nicknames such as "Ultimate Dragon Hunter" and "Håkonborne" for his incredible dragon hunting skills.

Mahou Shoujo HåkonWale★Magica

HaakonWale successfully unlocked the secrets of becoming a magical girl. However, ihateeveryone refuses to acknowledge Haak's prowess as a magical girl, stating he is not "status quo worthy." Haak has made it his mission to work really hard to become a magical girl that would make ihateeveryone's kokoro go dokidoki.

Skills and Abilities

Håkon has an impenetrable body that can withstand any temperature, physical trauma, or any of the deadliest disease in the known universe. His body and physique has been a subject of today's Uber scientists and proved a valuable research breakthrough in developing the standard battle armor for the Uber Elitist Corps for the ongoing war against the MAL Plebeians. Håk also has regenerating abilities, can walk through walls, can fatroll without fail, has an IQ of 900X, defeated an entire army numbering in the millions, and can circle the universe twice in 1/4 of a millisecond.

Stats:
Attack: 9000

Defense:

Special Attack: 9001

Special Defense:

Speed: 9002

Quotes

- "Normal life can be boring at times, sure. But not boring enough to make me want to experience true horror in the form of Everything That Is Wrong With Modern Anime - The Anime."

- "I'm not a horny teenage girl, though. I'm just a magical girl."

- "This sucks dick."

- "Because he's hard."

- "Sausage is best raw."

- "I like fat girls."

- "I came out yesterday."

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